Tyler and I have been married for a little over 5 years. Our courtship was nothing like your normal. He’s the all American boy, me the Mexican girl. Boy meets girl. Girl falls in love. Boy wonder why and how. Girl has to go back home. Boy goes and gets her back.
During that 1.5 years apart it was tough. I was told that he wasn’t true and not the right man for me. But I sticked to my guns. I knew what I wanted, him. He got me back. We never broke apart. It hurt and it was tough but truly worth it. In our 5 years of marriage I have learned a lot about him and myself. If I were to give anyone marriage advice it would be:
- Respect. This is super important. If there is no respect there is no love.
- Love. Don’t be afraid to show how much you love each other. A smooch before you leave for work. A little pat on the butt. Massages. Telling your spouse how much love them. Throwing a rag at their head while they are not looking and then blame it on someone else with a huge grin on the face! Little things like these mean a lot.
- Work hard. There will be ups and downs, work through them together. There is no more ‘I’ on a marriage. One cannot be selfish and expect their marriage to last. You have to think as a couple. You includes him/her as well.
- Agree to disagree. You won’t always have the upper hand on every fight. It is of utter importance to be okay with each others differences.
- Us time. This can be tough at times, specially after the kids come. Daily life stress can take a toll on everyone. Stress adn frustration can put you down. Always make sure to have you time whether it is a small conversation before going to be, snuggling on the couch watching your favorite show. Reading next to each other, loading the dishwasher. Whatever it is, do it together. Also, can’t forget about sex.
- Talk. Try to ask your spouse how his/her day went, but mean it. Don’t ask just to ask. Engage in conversation. Show that you care how their day went. Talk about anything that interests you both.
- Be you. Don’t be anybody else but you. Stick to your guns and to what you feel is good for both you and your spouse. What might have worked for mom and dad may not work for you. If you want to go left when everyone around you says to go right, go where your heart leads you.
- Enjoy. Take every day in. Enjoy it. Don’t rush it. Life, there’s only one. What better than to go through it than with the person you love the most?
There will always be good days and bad days. There will always be times when you’ll hurt each other whether intentionally or not. But there is always a ray of light to shine down on you both.
What is the best marriage advice you’ve ever gotten?